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Back to the sunglasses Agent Cantgetenoughalotof, I was chuffed to bits when you did that.I'd been trying to do that myself for the introduction of Bond kwill IS Bond character as a suave mysterious secret agent,but I couldn't get them to look right.One eye glass would be bigger and the ear piece would be uneven.I haven't mastered the paint on my new computer it won't undo what I've made if I want to correct it straight away!

My dearest Lordship (my darling),

Well, I got some sleep, and am alone upstate right now.. it's a cool
morning, and cloudy..
.. I'm feeling a bit in the middle of nowhere at the moment.. I guess
I need to know your lips.. I think that would ground me, or unground
me, as the case may be.. but the thought of your lips on mine has me
feeling other things.. I mean.. other places on me.. places hurt.. and
sore.. and wanting..
.. anyway.. just a little song for you.. I do believe the musician (a
favorite of mine) wrote this one in particular just for me, actually.. I
mean, I'm not entirely sure of that, as I've never met the man.. though
I did see him play once.. and his fingers move like silk across his guitar
strings.. there's no one who plays like him I don't think.. and somehow..
.. well, maybe he just knows these things about me..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zpfk6XX7w44
FFULL SCREEN..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qB1_c6dxs1E
FFULL SCREEN..

ever,
your sensitive v i o l e t (stem).. xx x (missing you)..

LAZY SUM UP :

.. okay, on my morning break, just a quick-- well, rambling.. lazy summer-upper..

.. Sir F-- uh, kw-- uh, baby bond.. (now sporting an incomprehensible handle I don't feel up to trying to spell at the moment).. was zeroed in on by our very talented (as it happens) hawk, while he was being held captive by some latex laden S&M torturer types, partial to green beans.. oh, that was at French (??) run Guantanamo Bay detention camp.. (set up specifically for all those kranky wayward babies allegedly responsible for all the evilish things going on in the world today).

Lady Kissy K., meanwhile, trying to get to her sword polishing duties with the king, was detained by a matronly woman [probably I.F. in her "matronly woman" disguise] known to excel at a special manner of enema-bag related water boarding.. (I can't make this stuff up, folks).. not realizing that the Lady in question would find it rather stimulating, as opposed to a deterrent.. NOTE: Kissy K.. let's face facts here.. this hospital where the king is being held captive has got to be some kind of front set up by the evilish queen so that she herself could keep a keen eye on him and that [now] rusty sword of his. [folks.. I'm actually beginning to think said sword has some kind of mystical powers or something.. it seems to be a very fought over commodity in these parts, and I'm not exactly sure why]..

CONCLUSION: Cumolatt is in trouble. Humpty Dumpty did indeed crack after baby bond's attempt to save the kingdom from-- actually, were we under attack, b.b.??.. I mean when you [reputedly] blew up MI6?..

.. [hmm, folks.. I think some manner of mind control has been installed in these parts.. my main agent, silly though he may be, seems to be acting without rhyme -- well, there is that Humpty Dumpty rhyme, so scratch that -- but certainly without reason. I'm pretty sure Henning is part of that whole mind control racket out of NASA.. (uh, let's not go there).. but, in any event.. I think baby bond might be contaminated, as it were. Now, if I were operating under MI6 protocol, I'd have to do him in myself.. But since I could care less about those evilish overlords, I think he should stick around. Yes, he's cranky.. but so very cute too, I think]..

.. okay, well.. Kw.. uh, Bond Kwills Is Bond: we need a new plan. You do need to watch your step.. those evilish higher ups at MI6 -- you know, the ones who set you up as an internationally renowned Humpty Dumpty terror operative -- will get wind of your escape, and be on your trail in no time..

.. I guess I'll set up another High Tea with the queen.. maybe just wear my panties to this one, as I think that tickles her.. and I'll see what kind of beans I can get her to spill.. (hopefully not green beans.. those looked nasty)..

.. alright:

OVER AND OUT. M.

Bond or whoever you are now…I have left your sunglasses on the post out by the sanatorium… And you shouldn’t be playing with paint at your age…use crayons!
I think Agent Cantgetenoughofit sounds better!

SPV(f)-M

Violet wrote
[probably I.F. in her "matronly woman" disguise] known to excel at a special manner of enema-bag related water boarding..

That was very good V…still laughing…

I think you are right about the King being in that place…I don’t think he’s getting the sort of attention he likes…And maybe that sword of his is special after all…It could even be Excalibur …and the lady of the lake wants it back…and what if the evil queen cate gets her hands on it…Oooh poor King G, what would he do without his sword…Jeez…what would I do without his sword…I’d be out of a job! …

Of course Cumalots in trouble, we don’t seem to have a single sane person in the village…and the village idiot (you know who you are) surpasses all village idiots…

Btw…be careful when taking tea with queen cate…I really didn’t like the look of those French beans (they were frozen ones, not even fresh)…

Kissy K
xx

Violet wrote:
LAZY SUM UP :

.. okay, on my morning break, just a quick-- well, rambling.. lazy summer-upper..

.. I don't usually quote myself, but thought I'd add:

.. oh, and just what was she doing before, then?

Karren B wrote:

Violet wrote
[probably I.F. in her "matronly woman" disguise] known to excel at a special manner of enema-bag related water boarding..

That was very good V…still laughing…

.. thanks, Lady Kissy K. for the goofiness compliment.. hope to flush out-- uh, flesh out more good yuks soon, good yuks gods willing..

S.P.V. (fl.) I.. [xx]..

[quote="Karren B"]Bond or whoever you are now…I have left your sunglasses on the post out by the sanatorium… And you shouldn’t be playing with paint at your age…use crayons!
I think Agent Cantgetenoughofit sounds better!

I was referring to you as Agent Cantgetenoughofitalot,and yes it does sound better without the alot at the end.

I gathered that Sir F!!! (though I cant think why you would come up with such a name for sweet innocent little moi!)

But don't expect me to write a summery with that in, its as bad as your Sir Falloffhishorsealot!

Kissy K
xx

Hope you found your sunglasses!

BABY BOND'S FIRST BABY STEPS TO SPY-DOM

FIRST COURSE: DATA ANALYSIS 101

.. kw-- uh, baby bond.. now that you've got to lay low.. (again).. I thought it a good time for you to bone up on your data analysis skills since, well, so far at least, you've proved to be somewhat lacking in this department.. [is there a department he isn't lacking in??]..

.. now I've got some instructional footage here -- (oh, by the way, my Lordship.. I concede there is canned laughter in this bit.. however, can't you put the educational needs of-- well, you know the situation.. and honestly, if there were a way to avoid the canned laughter, I'd be all for it).. Now, where-- oh.. so, baby bond.. pay close attention to this footage.. especially to Jerry's fine dissection of the facts replete with an obvious cogent understanding of the laws of physics.. (always helpful in such forensically challenged situations).. You will be tested on this presently..

.. actually.. before I get to the footage, I thought I'd share with you our new mission..

MI6's NEW [IMPROVED] MISSION STATEMENT:

.. first, to cut down on spills-- oh, wrong list.. (that's my personal gripes list).. okay:

1. To rid the world of.. well, just bad bad stuff..

2. (actually, this is a continuation of #1).. by locating remaining MI6 administrative staff and contaminated in-the-field operatives and terminating same. (Yes, kw-- uh, baby bond, I said: terminate.. using "extreme prejudice".. just like you did with Marlon Brando, in other words-- or, well.. it doesn't have to be extreme.. it could be a rather bland form of prejudice, I would think.. I mean, just 'cause you're killing people doesn't mean you have to be extreme about it)..

3.. then.. (this is a continuation of #2, which was a continuation of #1, actually).. hmm.. I forgot what I was going to say.. Oh.. THEN.. I will be the agency's new director, and you will be the *uck-up I keep around for entertainment purposes-- uh, I mean, you will be my A. Number One Agent: Bond Kwills Is Bond.. only this time you won't be used as a patsy.. (pretty sure)..

4.. then.. together we will rid the world of bad bad stuff, as well as the kind of intelligence staff that makes you have to fill out a lot of boring forms, 'n other stuff like that.

4. a.. oh, yeah.. as per the "bad bad stuff".. you'll need to locate Henning.. but before terminating, get some info. out of him as to his plans to destroy our spiritual leader: the Dalai Leonard.. oh, and suss out the queen.. find out if she and the king are having an affair behind Lady Kissy K's back-- oh, wait.. that's just a personal theory of mine.. no, find out why she's holding the king captive, and what's going on with that sword -- better yet, see if you can actually steal the sword and bring it to me.. I’d like to discern the purpose of all that polishing, as I’m pretty sure there’s something, uh, up with that..

Alright, I'll let you know if I come up with more.. but for now.. pay close attention.. and remember: discerning the truth is a very lonely business..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gcaq4ElAJrE
FULL SCREEN..


.. [Violet is back up the tower, and obviously exhausted from just contemplating all the work ahead of her in order to effectively process her cantankerous baby agent.. She sighs.. then tears a little piece of vellum from what’s left of her supply.. commencing to..


Dearest,

Sorry about that youtube link, but you could have
chosen not to have watched it, after all.. I mean,
I did warn you..
.. I’ve been up since 4:30 this morning.. I'm back in
Gotham for a few days.. I wrote you a few notes in my
head right before getting up, since I couldn’t sleep
anyway.. only, I’m too tired to recount them, which
is really rather sad, actually, since they were actually
quite nice..
.. I think it had to do with feeling to “belong” to
someone.. perhaps women understand this better
than men.. but I feel you all through me.. and it
does have me feeling rather tender and undone..
.. especially today, without any sleep..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yDxtITsID0w
FULL SCREEN..
ever.. your tender v i o l e t (stem).. xx x

Part 2 of above letter:

.. gosh it's a ghost town around here today..
I was so tired earlier, I noticed I wrote: "Deares".. instead
of "Dearest".. though now I'm thinking of "Dearess" as a
possibility.. probably after a few martinis though..
.. okay.. well.. really do need to get some zzzzzzzz's..
.. I hope all is well in Brit Land..
.. which actually reminds me of this song.. at least title
wise..
.. I think of this singer as among those who have voices
comparable to musical instruments.. just astounding..
.. okay.. this little good-night lullaby, then..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8cFdZyWOOs
FULL SCREEN..
ever again.. your v i o l e t (stem).. xx x

A concussed baby bond kwills IS Bond A.K.A Sir Falloffhishorsealot, is trying hard to make sense of things around here!

1. Are we living in medieval times here or in modern times?

2. Am I a baby, knight or spy?

3.Are we living in the same time zone? can we jump from one time zone to another like Dr Who,my great grandfather?

4. Did Violet my boss,my mentor,my sometimes surrogate mother whom I look up to with deep affection and respect , tell me to kill Marlon Brando?

5. Did Violet tell me to light the cannon that blew up MI6,but somehow lost the instructions on how much gunpowder to use?

6.Is Violet actually telling me...ME! ...to kill the rest of MI6..so she could be overall BOSS!?

7. Does all this mean that my boss,my mentor, my heroine is THE BAD GUY?

8.What does she mean when she says...I'll be her number two.. that I'll be minny V!?

9.A1! that means first class!.....not steak sauce like my friend who used to live in Canada says it means!

10. Does that mean I'm her favourite spy? her favourite...................agent? oh...relief........I thought agent Pussy Wussy was taking over from me for a second there!

11. So what does it all mean!? I mean,am I good or bad? am I ..................being....................manipulated?

12.Look what happened to me on my way to meet you M!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCU1qQ0cw6U

.. gosh.. I was going to take it easy for a while.. and now I find: THIS MESS.. a dilemma which actually is reminding me of..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPw-3e_pzqU
FULL SCREEN..

.. (god, I love youtube sometimes)..

.. okay.. now on to..

BABY BOND'S BASIC LESSON NUMBER 2: DON'T ASK QUESTIONS YOU DON'T ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER TO...

kwills wrote:A concussed baby bond kwills IS Bond A.K.A Sir Falloffhishorsealot, is trying hard to make sense of things around here!
1. Are we living in medieval times here or in modern times?

[Answer]: Question is irrelevant. Time is illusory.

kwills wrote: 2. Am I a baby, knight or spy?

.. Motown could make use of this question, I suggest.. let's see..
.. now.. a baby [as in pip squeak], knight [as in Gladys] or s.p.y. [as in: Scientology-Psychology YadaYadaYada] [short for "L.A.," in other words][or the human cesspool whoever was escaping when heading back to Georgia, as it happens -- in their biggest Motown hit, I mean].. [actually that's: s.p.y.y.y].. [or spy.. ay.. yi yi]..

.. anyway, b.b.. learn the Pips' dance routine, as here demonstrated.. these are actually vital steps, as per our next black op.. (you're correct if you've noted a couple of very bad puns in there)..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v78-ftcqpNw
FULL SCREEN.. (yes.. even though it's pixilated)..

.. oh, I just wanted to add, b.b., that I think I've actually given you a very good example [in the above material] of the incisive sort of Data Analysis I was trying to impart to you, as per the prior [baby steps] lesson.

kwills wrote: 3.Are we living in the same time zone? can we jump from one time zone to another like Dr Who,my great grandfather?

I'm hoping that's not your great grandfather as I happen to know that Dr. Who happens to be Dick Cheney.. though I do see some familial resemblance given that (just like your quiff-antenna) his pacemaker should make him a fairly accessible targ--

.. (no one reads these stupid threads, do they??)

kwills wrote: 4. Did Violet my boss,my mentor,my sometimes surrogate mother whom I look up to with deep affection and respect , tell me to kill Marlon Brando?

.. [sigh].. well, not exactly.. you were supposed to get to Henning.. who allegedly was posing as Colonel Kurtz.. though we were being fed misinformation by the evilish queen.. (as per our High Tea -- hers and mine -- where she started gushing about Apocalypse Now, etc. etc.. leaving me to, well, in that case, misread between the lines, as it were.. though I still maintain that that was exactly her intention, given that those of us at the very top are working a few subconscious levels beneath most common folk, b.b.. I think it's time you realize that).. oh, and so you killed Marlon Brando.. not realizing he was just, well, an actor.

kwills wrote: 5. Did Violet tell me to light the cannon that blew up MI6,but somehow lost the instructions on how much gunpowder to use?

.. no. guess again. I was merely preparing you to go on the DEFENSIVE, kw-- uh, b.b.. SHOULD we come under attack -- most likely by Henning and his gang of mutant country [sausage] butchers..

kwills wrote: 6.Is Violet actually telling me...ME! ...to kill the rest of MI6..so she could be overall BOSS!

yes.

kwills wrote: 7. Does this all mean that my boss,my mentor, my heroine is THE BAD GUY?

.. wrong conclusion, based on wrong-side-of-the-head concussion.

kwills wrote: 8. Does that mean when she says...I'll be her number two.. that I'll be minny V!?

.. if you would like to change your sex.. (well, your reputed sex, I mean).. divine yourself a little purplish flower (replete with purple ink), and find yourself hopelessly in love with someone who elaborately (at times, masterfully) ignores you.. be my guest.

kwills wrote: 9.A1! that means first class!.....not steak sauce like my friend who used to live in Canada says it means!

correct.

kwills wrote: 10. Does that mean I'm her favourite spy? her favourite...................agent? oh...relief........I thought agent Pussy Wussy was taking over from me for a second there!

Puss started as a Lady in Waiting and has diversified, just as we all are doing given these challenging times (and the fact that no one else on this forum dares to join us).. You, meanwhile, started out as a-- oh, never mind.

kwills wrote: 11. So what does it all mean!? I mean,am I good or bad? am I ..................being....................manipulated?

.. if by "manipulated" you mean being given a knighthood as a cover.. then.. after numerous [expected] *uck-ups.. you find yourself ingeniously stationed at that lousy cannon [Humpty Dumpty] which was itself ingeniously [subconsciouly] installed in my mind by the evilish queen [who obviously is versed in all manner of mind control methods].. so that I would unwittingly aid you in your inevitable [and now legendary] Humpty Dumpty blow-up *uck-up [of MI6] [allegedly], whilst MI6 was actually being "downsized" as part of an inside job to "clean house," as it were.. leaving only the most evilish higher ups to run things.. I mean, if that's what you mean by "being manipulated" -- well, then: yes.

As to your moral dilemmas, I suggest you check into the Sisters of Mercy thread for that kind of talk.

kwills wrote: 12.Look at the fight I had with Henning! I really tried my best M!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zIYvBY2 ... re=related

I take some heart given the "spitting" segment, as it shows you actually were paying attention to my last training tape. Next time, though, have another spitter stationed nearby to back you up.. (just in case).

kwills wrote: 13. No shit!

ibid.

.. p.s.. I have several guests arriving at my upstate castle this weekend, and may have to take a short leave of these premises.. (thank god). I may be around through tomorrow, however.. depending on how desperate I am to continue with this (obviously vital) instruction.

.. [my Lordship.. I hope all is well with you out there in London town.. I'm missing you terribly.. (which, as you know, is not unusual for me).. and will raise a glass or two (or three) in your direction this weekend.. (raspberry Margueritas, I think)..
.. anyway, I shall try not to come back here and pine for you, as my guests might find it a bit tedious of me, I'm thinking..
.. your ever hopeful v i o l e t (stem).. xx x.. secretly pining into her raspberry Margueritas]..

Those questions and answers are hilarious

Violet … where have you been?
I’ve been sitting by the garden pond with my tea set and panties waiting for you for days … was I suppose to go to the tower? or has your recent striving for world domination made you loss track or more important things … such as tea in the garden – btw the pale faced prisoners are looking much more tanned now and do seem to appreciate the sunflowers. I.F. has come up with a great new umbrella system to go over them so that she can still feather tickle their feet in the rain and doesn’t have to worry about to much sun ruining her fair complexion.

I’m not sure, but I think I saw Kissy K running by black pumps and a striking black leather cat suit with a nurse holding some type of bag chasing her … I was going to offer to help but then I noticed that she slowed down a little to let the nurse catch up and she was giggling – so I take it it’s a game. She ran right by baby bond who was doing some very funky moves is a shiny space suit … it’s good to know a nurse will be close at hand ... I hope that space gear is padded.

Love to you all queen cate

Your Highness, um, madam -- Queen Cate, I mean,

Wow.. are those purple velvet bikini panties you've got on?.. [what does she think she is, royalty or something?.. geez].. [I've only got my--

.. hmm.. I was going to save this for my Lordship.. but I guess this could be like a sneak preview sort of thing.. (it's time he knew my taste in lingerie, after all.. well, if I could afford it, I mean).. oh, and it's a Brit outfit too.. I'm sure that will tickle him.. hmm.. maybe for-- uh.. Chhannuckckk a.. (I can never get that spelling right, but noticed that even those of that faith have a problem with it.. and they keep changing it for some reason.. I mean, you'd think they'd finally decide).. [sigh]... you know, I haven't really thought this through, but I guess I may just have to convert.. but.. tell you the truth, I prefer their rituals and holidays.. especially this one, since one receives presents for twelve days in a row, I hear.. which means his Lordship could give me practically the entire Strumpet and Pink collection in just one holiday (!).. one for each day.. as we light those little candles they light.. my god.. how romantic.. gosh.. I didn't realize how much I could love religion.. just love it.. so.. my Lordship.. in addition to the second one pictured: Hunting through the Ruffles (Exploded and Capped).. [sounds like something baby bond would do].. check out: Midsummer Maiden.. both very v i o l e t like I find.. though Garden of Delights is quite nice too.. I like thinking of you unbuttoning all those lovely silk buttons down my.. well, you'll see..

[Violet looks all dreamy eyed]..

.. oh.. now wha-- oh.. yes.. oh, and my lord.. there's also Willow for winter.. (one wants to keep warm, after all).. xx x x

.. oh yeah, just click on each name at the top of the page.. as you peruse this little naughty garden of sorts.. (my lord).. xx..
http://www.strumpetandpink.com/
FULL SCREEN..

.. wow, I just realized that the collection continues at the end.. I mean, just when you think it's over there are more samples listed at the top right.. and.. well.. the Hunting through the Ruffles (Extended).. is TRULY v i o l e t like.. oh, and there's a Princess and the Pea (the title better than the.. well, you'll see).. Oh, and the Ming something.. very exotic-erotic.. Oh, and Maiden's Belt.. (my god).. (a new take on the Chastity Belt, I guess).. hmm.. we may have to extend this into other holidays, I'm thinking.. xx x

.. Queen Cate..

Gosh, I got so carried away with panties, I forgot to address certain burning issues.. (as if there could be more burning issues)..

.. Now, I'd like to correct you in your perception of my new mission as that of taking over the world, or whatever it is you said.. Now, I only seek to rid the world of [adulterated, most likely] evilishness.. (well.. with the exception of naughty-ish panties, 'n such.. and anything else that might be required boudoir-wise.. I mean.. one doesn't want to limit oneself.. and there's a lot of equipment we might try too.. need to consult I.F., I guess).. now wha-- Oh, so, I hope this clarifies things.

.. let me pour you a bit more of this, uh, blueberry tea..

Now.. Henning. What's he like, and who at MI6 does he answer to??..

.. [oh, gosh.. she's falling alseep again.. I really have to remember her opiate addiction before I start serving that lethal tea she likes so much]..

.. Ah, well.. maybe I'll just peruse the S&P catalogue again.. see which ones I think his Lordship would like the best..

S.P.V. (fl.).. xxx x (need to get some things done before the guests arrive).. (I'll be thinking of you, my lord).. xx

.. CORRECTION: ohmugod.. I've been working all day, doing this horrible sort of thing I've come to call: deep cleaning.. (it is just a horror to realize how dirty things get.. I mean.. drawers and cupboards 'n things you usually don't pay too much attention to.. usually.. until you're about to load up the house with guests).. ANYWAY.. it just dawned on me that NO.. Dick Cheney is NOT Dr. Who.. but DOCTOR NO.. (!!!).. (my apologies to the family, etc.).. I don't know how I made that mistake.. (I've always felt sorry for that little white kitty he likes to pet.. then again, he seems to be very fond of him.. hmm)..

Okay.. (oh, my Lordship.. I hope you liked perusing Strumpet and Pink.. I'm still not sure what your tastes are exactly.. but those silk buttons are..

[sigh]

.. anyway.. need to return to my never-ending tasks..

Signing out for now,
S.P.V. "M" (fl.) (stem).. x xx